Discombobulated

You too?

As happens to all of us, I recently needed to escape being online in order to clear my thoughts. I think the fact that this is normal shows how much being online 24/7 impacts our own ability to hear our own voice and to listen to what it’s saying.

Work wise I can’t disconnect completely- I doubt most of us can but not creating content becomes a stance that you are not willing to be part of the noise. And I find it interesting that when I want to reach out again, as I miss my online community, it is not to Instagram - my work partner of over 10 years that I have turned to. It is here.

Social media has brought me a lot of joy and through it my world and friendships have broadened and for that I will forever be grateful. So I don’t want to lose connection but the changes there are too corrupt. I read through my scribbled notes from my journal (yes, I still use a notebook to order my thoughts and life) which I unravel my thoughts to reveal that I no longer want to create content just to be visible or sell something and be part of the machine. It makes me feel dead inside.

I want to create connection. I am desperately searching to disengage from producing stuff to be consumed. Instead I need it to be an exchange in some way. Everything in this late stage Capitalism world is a commodity.

Instead I need creativity to be at the source of what I do. I need exchange and connection to be how I navigate this world. I know I am not alone in that what I want to do, doesn’t pay the bills but I can feel a shift in how my approach to this and the world in general is changing. I am trying to get off the merry-go-round as I can see a better part of the playground emerging. It’s still blurry but hopefully as I travel more mindfully I will navigate a way through. Too many of us are seeing the cracks in the system and the poison oozing out. We no longer need to be part of the given ideology but are busy finding out a new way to go. It is more important than ever to stay connected.